meisner - day 11, 12 & 13

at some point last week i realized i hadn't written about day 11 and 12.

and then i realized, there wasn't much to say.

11 was a breeze, it is easy for me to be present with a partner, and day 12 went in a billion directions, but the only pretty ones were the ones that were echoed by the cheers of all the different election parties that were happening around our space. the ugly ones were all tethered to disappointment in giving myself amazing circumstances but not allowing myself to really let what was going on for me take over. i was furious. i was grieved. i was a whole lot of other things besides. and i didn't let myself go there.

so i let myself down. big time.

and i let down the circumstances which were beautiful and tragic and something i wanted to explore anyway {more details on that to come when i have enough time to write that doesn't cut seriously into my sleep}.

and today. was just 3+ hours of watching other people. because my partner wasn't ready to go. so i just got to sit. and listen. and i learned a ton from feedback she gave others.

but i wanted to do. prove. move. put me in coach!

tuesday will come soon enough. i know. and i am shit scared of the place i've chosen to explore.


here be dragons!!!

and it involves:
a brother.
a red dress.
and revenge.