the bear hug

this was a week to wrap up in my arms and hold tight for long minutes. this week deserves a big bear hug of generous love. the kind that keeps going, arms shifting, necks curling in toward each other, skin holding on too. this week deserves to be savored and held up to the sky to see through and again and again and again because the people adorning the hours, the ones i got to sit across from between last sunday to this one, they make it one of the richest weeks i have had in a long time.

it was a week of changing tides. it was a week of encouragement and words and spontaneity and bitter sweetness. but most of all, it was a week to remind me what my life truly is here, how it can change in the course of one conversation or one meal, and what direction i might need to go next. i know there are losses ahead of me and at the very least changes, but i feel a peace swell up even in the face of these shifting lines and all i can do is hug tighter and longer and sweeter with a pause to pull back, look out and say yes.

and as the sun comes up over the horizon on a new week, it brings with it the clarity i have long been praying for and the realization that my life is rich and filled with wonderful people. i just need to slow down and savor it more often, which can be as simple as giving it a big bear hug, especially when it surprises me with a bear hug of its own, catching me by surprise, and keeping me grateful. so completely grateful.

housemates for a night

they talked over one another, one joke running into the next, laughter tying it all together in a neat bow on my back porch. the chinese lanterns were on. mojitos poured. and the night unfolded so perfectly,  so unexpectedly, to think i had almost let it slip me by.

a few hours before i had been sitting at dinner with four men i had never met before in my life. these four aussies converged earlier this week on spokane, washington with their newly purchased motorcycles which was the starting point of their trek down hwy 101 to los angeles. stops along the way include cape flattery, a moto guzzi shop where the premier guzzi mechanic works, and seattle, to visit me.

this last agenda item is solely because of one, random little website, that came and went several years ago called ten15am. it was a site dedicated solely to posting photos that anyone from around the world could submit as long as it was taken at 10:15am. it's a simple concept that was playful and fun, but also created many lasting connections to people i still am in contact with now, over 4 years later. it's amazing what you can learn about someone just from a regular cross section of their life put on display to the world. there was the father of two who traveled to turkey early on in my participation*, the well-heeled audiophile from melbourne*, the graphic designer from london with a cheeky sense of humor*, and the woman from the midwest who always photographed the same little figure on a box of matches, just to name a few.

and then there was scruff. the aussie from sydney with motorcycles, good taste in literature, and a massive beard. unlike some of the others, we never really got into the extensive email dialogue i have with the starred ones above, but he did express a particular joy at posting photos of passages from his current book to see if i could figure out what he was reading. he was also always happy to play along at whatever game we partook in on the site {my favorite being the alphabet game -- each day the 10:15am photograph featured a subject or caption starting with a and moving through the alphabet}.

on a whim {because i often get postcard sending whims}, i sent him a postcard a year ago that featured hwy 101 in washington state and i was surprised to get a reply that he would be out this way in 2013 and we should grab a pint. but i pint with scruff became dinner with the gang and five of us sat down to a meal of mostly friend chicken and beer at skillet diner last night. while we were there, discussions on where they would stay for the night ranged from the arboretum {no, they'll kick you out of there} to a last minute rental of a houseboat when i chimed in spontaneously, apologizing for the hardness of my hardwood floors, and offered up my generous space to their sleeping bags and sleeping pads.

and that's how my dinner mates became housemates for a night. and what a night it was. really. i've been writing here for about 2 hours, pitching every start, second guessing every paragraph because i can't assemble everything that this night was.

it was more than just a sum of their well-worn-in camaraderie, more than just the joy that a night of deep laughter can account for, more than just the gentle surprise any time these men, who can barely speak without playfully talking over one another, quieted down like gentlemen and listened to me tell a story or add my bit. it was definitely more than just a few lemonata mojitos made at the encouragement of brad, the un/official captain of the bunch. more than the generous compliments for my home and space they all made. and more than just the gratitude for being given an impromptu place to stay for a night. somehow, quicker than i could follow, i got let in on this band of friends quite alike one another yet so unlike me, and still i was welcomed in by open hearts and big laughs and that is all it took to bring our kindred spirits together.

scruff in his lounging glory. 

i really wish i had gotten portraits out there of them all.

the jokes about the effects lake water on the digestive system, totally okay. the ride on scruff's triumph down to lake washington to admire the stretch of the cascades from baker to rainier, absolute bliss. and i earned my badge by carrying the case of beer home with one arm secured around the box while balancing on the back of the bike and praying the cop we drove by wouldn't realize there was something funny about scruff's headlight. we hung out all night on my porch with a show and tell of the footage from the day, hoping we were talking quietly enough for the neighbors, and discovering that scruff, introduced this cocorosie song to his teenage daughters. at some point there was even a short duet sung by the brothers {scruff and lachlan are related if you can't tell from the below photo}.

i went to sleep listening to the chorus of snores from my living room and briefly considered closing the swinging door between the dining room and the hall, but fell asleep before i could.

waking up this morning and traveling from bedroom to bathroom in my pjs, my hair standing up on its end, i paused long enough to admire the state of the kitchen: hugh working his way through the eggs i had promised them, making breakfast for us all. earl grey was steeping in mugs on the counter. unusual on a work day, i sat down to a meal and let the morning stretch over more stories and one amazing egg sandwich. i wanted a refill of my tea and linger at least another 12 hours with them all, but the day and my job called me forward, the road calling out to them.

and here they are below, the lot of them lined up, ready for their adventure, unaware of how incredibly empty the house would feel later on today.

i consoled myself today by going through the photos i hastily snapped as they packed up, doling them out one by one on instagram. reliving snippets of stories. it has been something to hold onto as i think about why exactly, last night was so wonderful, and why, exactly, that kind of wonder and joy doesn't happen more often in my life.

sitting across from one of my best friends tonight at dinner, telling her a bit of the tale, we laughed together every time a song looped through on the restaurant's soundtrack that just happened to be the same instrumental song lachlan's computer used for the photo slideshows on my porch just 24 hours previous. she reminded me that i have a knack for the sort of magic and synchronicty that made last night happen and that it portends a promise of more joy and more opportunity to come.

yes, please.

but tonight, i'm just a bit lonely, feeling like the house is too quiet/ missing my new friends.

left to right: hugh, lachlan, capt'n brad, scruff

scruff packing up to head out.