still flinching

i am a flinching animal
always waiting for the next hand to strike
and while i might look you square in the eye
while i might kiss with abandon and offer my spirit freely
my thoughts leave a trail betraying the fact i am always watching your hand
{unless it's holding me gently already}
to make sure i see the next blow coming.

i am a flinching animal
scrubbing my scars on cobbled streets and stone buildings
salving raw skin with time and more time and lonely anonymity
trying to pull the moment toward me
when i cross some invisible line
where i can look anyone in the eye
coming or going
and not be afraid.