for the most part, i've pushed the mute button on the rawness of the exposure and in the process discovered that 1. i have a mute button and 2. that a mute button is a handy thing because it keeps things in plain sight while minimizing their impact {i can't go back into hiding and i wouldn't want to even if i could}.
i know there's a part two of processing everything i unloaded. the mute button will come off and i will look things squarely in the eye again as opposed to letting things rest softly in my peripheral vision.
but for now, this is enough.
wise words my mother sent me yesterday:
make haste slowly.
she's the second person in the past few days to reflect back my own voraciousness in making progress.
in self awareness. in acting. in life.
more to mull over.
and finally, my little brother correctly identified the closure marked in the piece. his exact words were season finale. the final episode of season 1 of the nathania story marking a specific moment of transition–the point at which the door behind is freshly closed and the light ahead is just beginning to suggest the shape of things to come.
i'm still not sure what it looks like out there and, for today, i'm okay with not knowing.
currently listening to: untitled #8 - sigur rós
2 comments:
"and finally, my little brother correctly identified the closure marked in the piece. his exact words were season finale. the final episode of season 1 of the nathania story marking a specific moment of transition–the point at which the door behind is freshly closed and the light ahead is just beginning to suggest the shape of things ahead.
i'm still not sure what it looks like out there and, for today, i'm okay with not knowing."
If it's ok with you, I'm stealing this... sometimes it falls to other people to say what you can't quite think of about yourself, but this is exactly how I'm feeling.
by all means marcus, please use this as you need.
this space is public for a reason. i have a lovely leather journal that i still do use at times, but that also used to fulfill the function that this blog fulfills. i keep {hopefully most of} the self indulgent writing and rants to myself. but the rest i put here in hopes of providing some moment of resonance with another person. even though we each live our own story, the particulars carry with them a clear link to the universal. it is my aim to provide a path to the universal for others.
so thank you for not only reading but participating in this space and letting yourself be visible. it's an honor to have you here.
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