i want/i need

we did an exercise a few weeks {geeze, maybe as much as a month} ago in meisner.
we had to repeat i want. i need. with arm gestures reaching outwards.

and i realized i had a hard time asking for what i want and need.

there are a lot of things i can't ask for. and a lot of people who i can't ask anything of. at least not material things. not things that require them to do something for me, not because they are going to spend time with me, because hopefully that's mutually beneficial, but because they care for me and will do this thing.

i also have other friendships where even asking for their time is a huge emotional hurdle. every time. no matter how much time we spend together. and i'm getting better about saying i have a hard time asking this, but....or perhaps: i can't just assume you would want to give/share that with me. i need to be invited. etc.

anyway, these are random musings while i wait for my face mask to dry. i'm long overdue for bed. and meisner was meisner today and i don't have a huge amount i want to report right away. for a change.

nighty night.

currently listening to: parking lot - eden smith {on repeat}